WhyWeWork BrianVee
WhyWeWork BrianVee

Episode 40 · 2 years ago

#40 Dr Lynette Reed Educator, Author, People & Culture Partner BrianVee Whywework

ABOUT THIS EPISODE

Dr. Lynette Reed is a People and Culture Partner. In this interview Dr.Reed gives valuable advice on how we can maneuver and live in a changing world.     

Contact Info  

Website https://www.expectations2reality.com/ 

Dr. Lynette’s Profile linkedin.com/in/dr-lynette-reed-1b91051b  

Email expectations2reality@icloud.com  

Twitter ExpectaReality  

About 

"It’s time for a reality check. Do you ever feel like you are out of sync with the universe? What about struggling to connect and inspire your team? How about inspiring your team to adapt to change? If you answered yes to any of the above questions then I can help. I provide step-by-step guidance for business leaders, organizations, and individuals to check their expectations and live a more focused life in a constantly changing world. 

When organizations are able to respond quickly to change, the resulting embrace of strategic initiatives and adoption of the process can fundamentally impact your companies bottom line. My three-part change management model helps individuals and companies to build a strong foundation of behaviors that keep you moving forward with a calm and focused plan. If you’re interested in learning more about how change management can help you please use the link below for a free 30-minute consultation. Hope to talk soon! "

...welcome to why we work with your host Brian VI ous He speaks to people like you from all over the world as we together dive deeper into our motivations, struggles, joys, seemingly missteps, hopes, warnings and advice which would be an encouragement to us all to get up. Get going on, Keep on working. Working is tough, but working is good. Now here's your host to why we were way. And this is why way. Today I have the great pleasure of speaking to you with Dr Lynette Read. Dr. Lynette Read is an educator on author a podcaster. She also dabbles in photography and songwriter, but she has a model in which helps businesses, business leaders and individuals help them get focused in their life. Help them set expectations so that they're not tossed to and froze. Oh, in an ever changing world. And I want to find out from Dr Reid how these expectations and focuses in life tend to fall short in people's lives. So listen with me today as we talk with Dr Lynette read, I'm Brian V, and this is why we work today. I have the great pleasure of speaking with Dr Lynette read. Good morning, young lady. Good morning. How are you today? I am doing wonderfully well. I know that your gracious lady, I have made a couple mistakes here thus far. And you still have a smile on your face and you're still willing to go forth. So as I mentioned, I did a interview or a, um, introduction to you just a moment ago. And could you give us a proper introduction? Just something to fill in what you are doing now and then we'll get mawr into the reeds. Sure. Yeah, well, I've been doing the work that I'm doing for about 20 years now, and it's really talking about how do you connect from one person to another? A lot of the people I work with are in business. I do a lot of writing eso It's really just kind of a journey that I took to get thio the place I am now. So I love what I do. So that makes things even better. As you mentioned to me a moment ago, that you were a speech pathologist for the first part of your career and now you're into communications. And I said that I am quite nervous knowing that you are well in tuned with proper communication. So I'm just hoping I can hold my own. But Dr E Like I said, I haven't done that for probably. Oh, my gosh, 15 years. It's been a long time. So, uh, so I don't I don't I don't use any of that really very much. Except for the communication part. Well, it's It's like it's like, well, like a right And they say, riding a bike. But for me, playing football. So I used to play football. I don't play football very well now, but I can see what it's wrong. Yeah, e even has not done properly. But, Dr Rhee, can you bring us back into your your first? What would have been your first job? Or maybe something from your youth where you maybe got out of the house and did something a little differently than going to school? Yeah, well, I guess going back all the way. You know, we did used to do the lemonade stands when I was a kid. So, you know, that was pretty popular back then. So first, who would have been? We just e had my my my friends. Sometimes we would have eliminate stand together. Or sometimes I would just do it by myself. So, uh, back in those days, you know, you could pretty much sit outside by yourself without your parents out there so you could do it on your own. E could see it. I mean, there is. You see some news recordings of people doing it now, but it seems like it's a tougher gig nowadays. E there were full masks and gloves and e. Yeah, well, but you can use credit cards now. We've actually seen that where there's kids out and they have their little credit card machine, so they can have you paid for it that way. So I saw there was it wasn't a kid at someone's window one day, but they knew the person was coming to ask for something. And they're like, Oh, sorry, you don't have changed. He pulls out the credit card...

...like, yeah, it's a whole new world. Yeah, when you did that, that lemonade stand, what was your motivation to get out of the house? Who's there? You're just like, Oh, this might be fun or you wanted some money or someone said Get out! Well, I think it's probably but a little combination. You know it. It's fun. Thio, you know, put together the lemonade, get your stand set up. And then, of course, you know the money always is Ah, a little bit of a motivator. I think that's, you know, like any business you're trying, Thio bring some income into your life. So that's probably the main motivation eso along the way. I know that you had your first job and you can reiterate, but that was out of college. But was there any other small sort of thing that you would have done up until high school? No, not really. Uh, we were pretty way didn't really do a lot of work like that. I mean, I worked at home, you know, doing chores, but it wasn't really considered, you know, it was my job at home, but I didn't have to go outside of that for income at the time. You know, out of the few interviews I've done thus far, nobody said chores. Oh, yeah, and I think it's something that you know, I don't want to just brush by and say, Oh, yeah, chores but you know a responsibility in the home. I know my Children are seven and 11 and as they grow there, I mean, I remember one gentleman once saying, You know, at four they were able to scrub the toilets. You know, whether you do it good or, you know, not so good. It's it's getting done. But there are chores in the home, like for my listeners, for people to whether they have Children or they're just growing up themselves, opposed to just sitting around and not doing anything thinking mom or dad or brother, sister someone's or that just gets magically taken care of to take on a little bit of responsibility is something that, obviously, in your case, doctor, it was a good thing to have chores for you growing up. Yeah. Oh, yeah, I think you know, depending on how, of course it's set up. But you know, whenever doing chores, it's teaching your work ethic, and it's teaching you how Teoh to be a part of the whole assed faras in your household. If your parents do all the work, then you're really kind of letting them have a belief system that things were gonna be done for them on that, they're not gonna have toe work for things, regardless of whether they're doing it for money or not. And I know a lot of people have a nice system set up where that the Children actually get to pick their chores and they have, like, a little amounts of money, like a nickel or quarter or whatever it ISS and they picked which tours they want to do for the week, and then they get quote unquote paid for it. So it's great s Oh, yeah, so I think every, you know, even if you're doing something like being responsible for cleaning up your room or but but making it fun to, you know where. It's a good, happy memory because, you know, chores doesn't necessarily have to be a bad thing. You know, it's no their wit's. That's a great idea to set it out and even let them choose. Especially if you have two Children, right? Like, you know, first captain first pick or something along those lines, and I'm over in Asia now in South Korea, and I find a lot of Children are not given that responsibility like Mom. It tends to be a mom, Mom will handle it or someone's going to handle it. And you just go study. You know, this is your even from elementary school where you would think that, you know, play would be a bigger priority, but it's not, um, not at least a as big a priority of studying but chores and taking your own responsibilities. They think it's too much of a burden for them. Yeah, well, And I think to, you know, you could make the argument for your studies being a chore. If that's a priority, your carry on tap, then you know, there said a good look. We're going to take care of this work, but your job is to take care of your school, make sure that it's great, uh, doing extra, you know things. So, yeah, I think that's the challenge is to find ways to define it especially, you know, with the world the way it is right now, we're so global. I mean, here we are in the talking to each other all the way across the world. And so we're learning different culture that we wouldn't have learned 15 20 years ago, you know, because we would not have been able to talk to people in different parts of the country. So s so I think that you're right. That's a big challenges, you know? How do you define that and make it work for your place? Yeah,...

...that's that's a good point you make with defining it. So rather than just saying go do your work. I'm not saying and not saying, Well, we're doing this, and this is for you to do. And this is where we're gonna, you know, balance out some of the responsibility in the home, like without sitting. That's a really great point of making sure you define it, not just assume it. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, because, you know, also, when you think about little kids, they don't really, uh this will be my speech path sticking in this, uh, they don't really think in terms developmentally, uh, critical thinking. And you're teaching that to them. And so as you're growing, you're learning things that you did not know on. So I think a lot of times parents assume that kids know what they know because we're all, you know, human beings. But really, kids need to understand what they're doing things to make them that are able to integrate it into who they are and what they're trying to work on. So with you, Dr Reid, how did you start to figure this out for your path? And when did that start for, you know, figuring out where you want to go to university and what you wanted to take, How how did that start to shape? Well, you know, I kind of fell into it. It really wasn't something that I wanted. Thio do per se. It wasn't like a lifelong career, but at the time I was thinking more in terms of, you know, we were not. I was not in a wealthy family, and so I had to think in terms of making money to, you know, pay the bills, things like that. And so at the when I started school in my undergrad, it was more about how do I get a job quickly so that I could get out there and make money? And so I chose the profession because it was very easy to get into it and and to kind of fall along that path. And I did that for a number of years, you know? Just kind of thinking in terms of what do I need to do Thio to make a living? And then I fulfill myself in other ways with you. No hobbies. So s so I think you balanced it out that way. How is it that way? What was your undergrad? I'm sorry. What did you take in your undergrad? It was speech fast. It was a called communication. If it is a disorders is what it was called. Yeah, And what led you that way? Are you saying that you fell into that? They had They had a really good program at the college. I was a little bit close. Thio. Yeah, it was like a conscious choice of Oh, let's go away to college. So yeah, I had I went thio just a local college, and so So that was kind of my trajectory. So with that path, though, that, you know, with speech pathology and what was the proper name for it again? It was called communication sciences and disorders. So was there a reason you ventured that way? Did you know someone with Yeah, I knew a number of people in the profession. Yeah, I know a number of people in the profession, and so and like I said, they had a really good program at the local school. So I decided, you know, what the heck? Let's do that. You know, at that age, I was 17 when I graduated from college from high school. And so it wasn't like I was thinking to myself, What do I want to do? You know, 20 years from now, it was more like, Hey, I need a job. What would be a good you know, college education? I have to get a job. So I just kind of randomly picked it because I had heard, you know, that it was a pretty good job toe have and there were plenty of them available. That's one thing you could always say about speech therapy from years ago. To now is they always need them. It's very hard to find enough of them. So it's Ah, it was a critical need kind of thing. Kind of like being a nurse or physical therapist. Things like that. Yeah. I was thinking I interviewed someone who had a similar path to you, and it was she was a nurse, you know, it was pretty secure. It's something she knew she could get right away, and it led her along. Her career is well, so for you. What was your first responsibility in your position? Were you speaking with people or was it more administration? I did. Well, I did a number of jobs starting out because I wanted to learn a bunch of different things. But then I kind of fell into working for the local hospital. And actually, what I did in that job was I started to put together with my boss, who was the director theme. The it was called a I can't put gosh, what do they call it? That was so many years ago. It was a cleft palate team. They had a they had what they what would they would do is instead of having all the doctors in different places, This was back before, you know, this was like...

...years ago, they would have you anybody who is having a critical care experience. Mine was particularly this cleft palate, because that's where they started it. Have them integrated so that it became a team effort as opposed to the person went from one doctor to the next to the next. Without any. Yeah, s O s. Oh, really? I had a kind of a unique job because I was doing the coordinating of the meeting and the working with the parents and things like that. So that was that was probably probably one of the most significant jobs that I had working. I did a little bit in school systems and things like that, but that was probably where my interests lied. More was the coordination part of it. It's and that kind of thing. And as you mentioned after your third year, you were married. So you were already married and, yeah, I waited. Yeah, way were crazy. I don't know what we were thinking, you know? We were I was 20. Yeah. So 37 years in now. So I think you picked the right man. Yeah. Yeah, I did. We used to feel like each other, too. So that were carried up? I think so. How long did you stay into speech therapy itself? I Gosh, I would say often on for about 15 years. Um way. Waited about about seven years into the marriage to have kids. And then I had two daughters. So, you know, I work part time doing things, but I basically stayed at home and did remote work, and and then I started just kind of shifting during that period of time, you know? Where what's I had kids. I started looking at it more from the perspective of okay, I don't I don't need the money as much anymore. Now, where do I want to go? So that was kind of the transitional area with that? So it was It was more of a logical step or just gave you. You had more freedom to choose what you wanted. Yeah. More freedom to choose. Yeah, Yeah. You know, like I said, the first part of it waas kind of just learning the ropes and figuring out how I wanted. You know how I wanted to make the money, But then it shifted Thio. Okay, now we're financially pretty set. We're not, you know, millionaires. But we're doing good enough that we could have kids and I could stay home because I did feel like a the time that, uh, kids air. It's very important for them. Toe learn a system of society, and I wanted to be the one to teach that to him. And so I think that was an important aspect for me. So I did spend most of that period of my time, uh, taking care of the kids. But I also worked, So I would, you know, just kind of insert Children instead of studies, you know, and I still working both times, but then just doing it kind of in an integrated fashion. So what? I know of your work and this is somewhat of the bedrock. Is the foundation starting with the proper foundation. And obviously, you were trying Thio implement that for your own Children as well. Exactly. Yeah. Eso When did you decide to take this step into the path that you're in Now, what was what was the final? Oh, my gosh. Yeah, it was kind of a fluke, actually. I had been doing some writing. I kind of during that period of time that the kids were young. I fell into writing on doing some editing for a publishing house out of Nashville, and this was back in the time before there was what what was called remote work. Uh, I'm kind of showing my age here, but my remote work didn't exist before this year. Well, I know that's what it seems like, anyway, but seriously, yeah, it's really changed eso I used to do remote work where I would go spend I go to to Nashville four times a year for a week and work at the office, and then the rest of the time, I do my work here in my house and just send it in, be a computer and computers were new back then, you know, they were s. So it was like an old, very old antiquated system. So it was like the the first view of what remote work could look like. And so s so I did that kind of as an interim thing and on And then I got to where I was doing some work, trying to think of what even made me go there. I was talking to some people and they said, Hey, you know what you really should do? You should really go get your doctorate. And I said, Well, you know, what would I even think of doing that in on? They said, Well, there's Ah we saw way Think you would be really good in something that had to do with communications or, you know, working...

...with people on. I said, Okay, well, I'll think about that. And about two weeks later, I was looking in a magazine of all things, and there was an article that was talking about a new profession that was coming out, or a new Dr program that was coming out that was called spirituality, sustainability and inter religious dialogue. So basically, it was a world peace degree, you know, and the guy one of the two, the professors were Paul Knitter and J. McDaniel, who were both, You know, pretty big if you, you know, if you're in the world of, uh, religion and sustainability and inter religious dialogue, these with the guys And so I said, Well, you know, I don't really have any background in that area, but I'm gonna see if I can get in the program and we'll just kind of see what happens. And so I I just threw it out there, and sure enough, I got a call and they accepted me into the program. I had to take a few extra classes to kind of, you know, round it out. But I got accepted into the program and just went from there. So this is how long did that program take? I mean, it was maybe 2 2.5 years. I want to say, Okay, husband was, you know, the kids were, like, in middle school, you know? And I went to my husband and said, Okay, what do you think? And he was like, you know, whatever you want to do, you know what? We're there. And so eso we I said Okay, I'm gonna go for it. And I had to go up Thio dating It was up in dating of all places, and my brother lived in Cincinnati. So I fly into Cincinnati. He picked me up. I'd spend the weekend visiting with him and then go to classes for the week and then come back and then come back and dio once again a remote. It was a remote thing. Eso I did the remote that way. So, so, so remote has always been my friend. I mean, for for years it has because I was able to do things that I would have never been able to do if they had not had the remote programs that they did. So just by the time frame that you gave without divulging your age or anything like that. But you're into thirties doing? Yeah, I think it might. It might have just reached 30. Yeah, I think I was e was in my 30 somewhere. Yeah, I do my math in my head for for listeners to say you did a doctor program out of nowhere. This wasn't you weren't on a path from high school. Your undergrad masters degree to dio. Wasn't you live, Cem. You know, you took care of your Children. You raised your Children, and then you jumped into a doctor degree for people listening to say, you know, and 30 is not the benchmark, because when I did my masters degree, there was a lady doing her masters degree who I believe went on to do her doctorate. At least a certificate and she was 70 something. Yeah. Oh, yeah. You know, and it's three idea of Oh, you know, I'm too old, like, you know, when we're younger, like some people say, Oh, I'm 28 29. I'm too old to do something different. No, you're not. No, Never too old. Never too old. Yeah, And I think something like Cove. It teaches us that that if we're not, especially if you're having difficulty with our job and we need to upgrade our skills or do something different, it's never too late to do something. And I think your story in itself of having Children and then changing careers and doing a doctorate is e think that's the challenge is thinking outside the box. I think we get in our minds and say, You know, this is all we can dio and then we never really reach out there and say, You know, Hey, let's try this. And I may be a little bit too much that way thing just thinking, okay, Normal way Just, you know, whatever you could Dio, you know, because I think to myself nowadays I'm thinking, you know wow, because I'm so familiar with remote work, happy done it for the number of years I had. I think, you know, why don't more companies do that? And then Cove it came and it was like it just showed everybody what the world would look like you know, if you didn't have that ability to think way beyond. Okay, I got to get up in the morning. Goto work, you know, and get that done. And, you know, and to me, that's the biggest challenge to is that every company is different, every person is different. And so their path has to be their own and doesn't mean a strong right. It just means that they've got to figure out what's going to bring them. Joy, what's gonna bring them? A sense of purpose, things like that. So after your PhD, how did that pivot you into your new career? Well, you know, that was the funny thing is originally I thought it would be mawr of a religious context, you know, because it was, you know, spirituality, sustainability and religious dialogue. Most people think of those things as...

...religion, and for me, it was always a little bit different. You know, I was I was kind of of the belief that spirituality was something everybody had. And so what? I actually did my doctorate work. My my dissertation was on spirituality. And so one of the things I learned in all of that was that when you're talking spirit, you're talking breath, those air, the roots But they go together. So for me, it always kind of came back to when I got to my doctor. It was with every breath you take, you get a decide what you're going to do with it. You're really they're gonna strengthen things or you're gonna fracture them. And so if you use that as the core element of anything you do, then you know it's gonna it's gonna build whatever you want on top of it. And so for me, that was kind of the turning point on talking to people like Paul Knitter and J. McDaniel. Just, you know, opens doors that I would have never imagined because they had such a knowledge base of those types. The things and so, um after at that point is where I started saying OK, if spirit is breath and we're building blocks, then everything basically falls on top of that. And so that kind of became the premise. But then the challenge became okay. So if I say spirituality, people automatically think either religion or crystals, believe it or not. So I had to figure out a way How do you integrate the vocabulary To make it so that you could communicate this very, um, visceral experience into something tangible that people could use for work for their daily lives? Things like that. So that was a turning point. Yeah. So is this how you created the work that you do now in the model that you developed? Yeah, Exactly. Yeah, that's the That's exactly where it started. So So can you give us an idea of what that is and what it is you present to organizations, leaders and individuals? Yeah, it's ah, it's actually three things. And the way I found it, Waas, Whenever I was doing my dissertation, I was noticing you know what strengthens things and what fracked Sure things. What behaviors do we have that strengthen either A person, Ah, group a company. The city, you know, whatever on DWhite fractures it and the three things I found that with almost 100% authenticity were words and actions match on. That's a really big one. Because if you think about it, if your words and actions don't match, then authenticity kind of falls. Trust falls because because if you don't do what you say you're going to dio. Or if you're not living an authentic life, then you're going toe. Always be fracturing yourself. You're gonna be fracturing the people around you on fracturing the organization as a whole. And so, like, for instance, with companies, If I say, you know, if you say okay, my, my employees are important, But then you're always criticizing your employees or you're not taking care of them. Then your words and actions aren't matching. And so you know, what are people gonna believe about your company? You know, and you see this in real life where people just say things because they want to comfort people or make them feel like they're on board. But then they turn around and do something different. And that's where you get the fracturing and the lack of authenticity hurt. Your brand hurt your you know, and then it hurts you as your core person because if you're not being authentic, toe what you're believing on finding ways to word it. You know where you're expressing yourself in a way that doesn't fracture people, then that's one of the big core elements. The other one is that you identify who you wanna be is a person is far as, um adjectives. So, like, for instance, if I was going toe meet with somebody, probably one of the first things I would say is, Okay, who do you want to be as a person and think about action adjectives that you can use that you can live out. So it would be things like friendly, helpful, caring, empathetic, efficient those types of things because you can control those things. And in a world where ah lot of things are out of control, especially now, you know, with the craziness that we have in our lives, if you have something that you can use is your base for your behavior, then it's gonna help you to strengthen who yours person. Because all of your actions not only have to match what you say you're going to do, but they also have to match these words you've chosen. So, for instance, if I say one of my words is to be friendly and then I go scowling at people all day, um, I going to feel...

...good about myself. How is that gonna make me connect to myself? Whereas if a bad situation happens, and I say, Okay, my one of my words is friendly, and then I say, Okay, this terrible thing just happened. All right? Now I have a choice to make. I can't control the situation. I can't control its around me, but I can't control how I'm gonna act and so I can say, All right, I want to be friendly in this situation, you know, maybe direct, maybe explore expressed my frustration, but do it in a friendly way, Or do it in a caring way. That breath comes into play. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Where you're saying okay with every breath, you know, So I always laugh when they say Count to 10. Take a deep breath. Well, that's basically what they're saying is pause for a minute and think about what? What action you want to take here That's gonna support those words you've chosen for yourself on. Then make sure your actions match those words. And so that kind of pulls that all together. And you can see it kind of creates a little cycle in your life where every time frustrating things happen especially, you know, since you have young kids, you know, Sometimes your kids were just all over the place. And you're like, Oh, and if you just okay, take a breath, alright? What? Actually, I want to teach my kids, you know, how do I want to teach my kids to do this? Because they are gonna mimic. And so if you show them hey, when you're frustrated, be friendly, then that's something you're not only doing for yourself, but you're teaching your kids how to dio. And then they could learn that and put my poor daughters. I have two daughters that air. You know, now you know, grown. But they were kind of my guinea pigs for the younger version of it. So they had to put up with it all growing up. So they were good sports about it. So But then the third one is, uh, what I used to call where your expectations meet reality. And, uh, you have to line them. And it actually came because I was talking to a counselor wants and they said, You know, the further away from reality your expectations become, the more distressed you will become. And so, to me, I thought to myself, Okay, so if you want to not be distressed, then you have to align your beliefs with reality. That doesn't mean you can't dream for things or try for things that are outside of the box. It just means that you know, if there's a law or if you know, if something's happening that you're not gonna be able to change, then you have to think from the world of Okay, this is the reality of the situation that we can't change and then use that as a basis for where you're going forward and those three things kind of working in a cycle together with each other. So that kind of was what I started finding. And then I've been practicing it, showing people it for now, probably about 15 20 years, and it still remains very consistent. And I think it's because it comes from this basis of spirit which has to do with how do you connect with yourself? How do you connect with others and how do you connect with the world? You know, that's that connective ity that you're looking for whenever you're looking to dio work or family or whatever it is you're trying to do. So from your work. What? I guess from the, the micro or from the macro. What types of changes Are you able to see yourself with these organizations, leaders and individuals? Oh, I think the biggest one is You see, you bring up sense of peace and calm to the workplace. You bring authenticity to the workplace. Um, you bring, uh, cohesiveness to the workplace. Uh, and you know, for people a lot of times, the way that I'm coming into a company is there's been a conflict or somebody's upset about something, or there's been a war between two people. And so my job is to go in and try to figure out how toe, um, bring those people back into a place of cohesion. You know what I mean? Eso eso. What I'll do is I'll train the people and teach them the model, and then they use the model at work. And so, you know, imagine a company where people's words and actions match and everybody has a defined word, you know, like for instance, a lot of times I'll say to the company if I'm doing a team thing is pick a group as a team, pick a word. You know what? How are y'all gonna work with each other? You know, Is it gonna be, are gonna be friendly to each other, compassionate to each other? You know, what's that gonna look like whenever you get frustrated with each other in the group? And so you're going back to that whole idea of There's so many individual people with different passions and different belief structures. How do you integrate that? And And that goes into the whole discussion about diversity, inclusion and all of those things, too. Because if you're using the model, you don't have to worry about diversity and...

...inclusion because everybody is on an equal footing as long as their behaviors are managed in that, you know, on that the path. So you know, it touches on a lot of stuff. They're probably, you know, it doesn't matter how many ways you try to help some people. They're not going to be changed. So you probably have some experiences with that. But it would be interesting to see you go into a company that, as you said, might have had a fight or two People are arguing or just something blew up and then you go in there. And how hard is it for you to even, you know, open the door, the company, and go in to present yourself a someone who's going to help heal the company. How un Recep of these people with, you know, you know, arms crossed or like Okay, what what's she going to do for us? Do you have lots of experiences with that? But then as you speak and you present your material that you can see them relaxing and this working well, you know, that's a That's a really interesting question because, you know, when I talk to people who do like minded things like I do, because there are people out here who who do this type of work, one of the things that we find as a challenges Ah, lot of people don't want to learn it. You know, a lot of times, whenever I'm first coming into a company, I'm doing it because the boss has said, Sorry, you have to do it, you know what I mean? And so I think it's actually rare. Many times when you find somebody who truly, truly says, Oh my gosh, I want to change myself as a person, you know? Yeah. So I think to me, you know, that's one of the things that has shifted. I think a lot with co vid is that people are starting to realize that spiritual more spiritually component of Okay, we are interconnected. We've actually seen a visual representation of how completely connected as a society. We are with the cove. It because, you know, it started in one place and you can see the impact that it's had. Now imagine now take cove it and turn it into a negative behavior or an unkind way of talking to somebody or something like that. And it's just a fracturing. But you don't see it physically like you dio. And so to me, I think the challenge is showing these people that this does truly, truly impact the way their business is run the way their home life is. Um, all of these things air interconnected, not unlike the physical viruses that you see if it is a emotional virus, so to speak. And so I think things change as society changes. I'll be very interested to see what happens post co vid as faras that but you know it's funny. I never really bothered me, I guess from the way I've always viewed my world, it's always been Just go try something And you know, if it works great. If not, you know, you just say, Well, that was an epic failure Move on on dso When people are presented to me who are very upset or hostile towards me it doesn't really bother me because I'm ableto I've done the model long enough Now that when somebody makes me feel a little distressed with their behavior, I can really quickly go back and say, Okay, who do I want this visa person I wanna be, you know, friendly, you know, helpful. And so I just kind of draw myself back into those words which is taking that breath and saying, Okay, these are the words I'm going to use to deal with this difficult situation. And I think, you know, if you look at leaders who are very successful in organizations, ah, lot of them inherently have these behaviors integrated into who they are as people because, you know, you don't have to necessarily teach it to people. A lot of people have it already kind of pre wired into their system, you know, and then society plays rolling all that, too. So, uh, it's funny because I guess I'm thinking maybe it's not a good way. But if you were a pest control person and someone said there was, you know, a venomous steak snake underneath the porch or there is a rat over there and you have to put your hand in something bit, you're like, Yep, you're right. I do need to get the right things in some way. I'm not saying the leaders or individuals or pests or rat, but if you get that negative reaction to you, you really know your needed, like it's evidence that you are needed here for this situation. If they're resistant to welcoming you onboard, well, and that's the thing that I think is the biggest challenge with stuff like this is that you have to recognize that it's not your job to fix people. You know it's your job to say, Hey, here's here's a tool for you to put in your toolbox. If you want to change is a person on def, they don't want to change. Then the...

...decision becomes, do they stay at the company. Do they continue to just keep the negative attitude there? You know, because you can't just say to somebody Hey, don't do that anymore or you're going to get fired. You know what I mean? And and then they were going to stop doing it. But there's gonna always be that underlying, you know, behavior because they're not happy. And one thing I find that helps me, too, is that I am a pretty firm believer. Although I have no proof or a research on this is that fear is a lot of times a motivator. When people are acting that way, I find that the more fearful they are of something the mawr, they become aggressive. You know, it's that reptilian reaction, fight or flight. Well, if you've got somebody who's being incredibly passive aggressive or being very loud and, you know, attacking you, my thought iss Well, you know, that probably is related a lot to that fighter flight mentality of I'm afraid of this situation and what's happening. And so therefore, I'm going to protect myself so I don't, you know, quote unquote die. Yeah. So? So you're passionate? Yeah. Whenever you're thinking, okay. this person is that fearful that they're attacking me, who, you know really cannot do them any harm. Then, um you know what? What's their story? What's making them fearful of this? You know, Dr Reid, what is? I guess besides cove it Unless this doesn't change what you do because you do do remote work. What is a typical week look like for you? So are you completely into helping out these organizations and people or you also doing your writing and podcasting? What is a typical week look like? Oh, yeah, Well, pretty much all of the above. Yeah. I really never know what my week is gonna look like. Some weeks I'm doing mawr training. Some weeks, I'm doing more writing. Some weeks, I'm doing like research. A lot of times I'll do some I'll do research. I like to kind of keep up on what's going on. Sometimes I'm doing things like this when I'm doing more podcast or visiting with people. What's really been nice is with cove it More and more people are technologically savvy as faras doing zoom meetings, and so I've got to have a lot more discussions with people from different countries. You know, normally I was kind of ST stayed more in the United States. But I've had mawr, like, you know, like, for I've had more discussions with people from different parts of the world, which is so interesting because, you know, when you're factoring in the work that I do, especially in a global world, culture plays a huge role in it. Um, I can remember in high school my I had a wonderful Spanish teacher and she that was the big thing she taught in the class that really stuck with me all these years was that when you're learning a language, you're not only learning the words in the vocabulary, but you're also learning the culture because the things that we might do in one part of the world maybe a nen Sultan, another part of the world or, you know, there's a different way of seeing things and and that kind of helped shape my view on, you know, even in a city, you know, like, if I live in a very small town outside of Austin, Texas, and I live in and the culture here is very different than when I go into Austin or when I go to Dallas, which where my kids live. And so you know, even that close our cultures really shift in how people think and do things, you know. So that plays a role in how we communicate. No, I understand living in South Korea how things could be done differently and it takes. It takes, um, appreciation and patients Thio understand how things could be done differently, but still done right. Opposed, Opposed to thinking We're always right. So with your writing and being an educator and a leader, and also, you know, I think you're into photography and song writing. Yeah. What is some something that brings you little disdain? Or what is difficult about some of the things that you dio what is most difficult? Oh, gosh, that's a good question. Um, you know, I think I've been doing it long enough that the working of it's not. I think that the biggest challenge I find is that, um since it's not a how do I put it, it's not a mainstream idea. It's not a mainstream way of looking at the world right now. We're kind of in my my view of it were more binary thinking as, uh, look a Facebook and, uh, the politics and things like that. It's...

...very much us versus them here in the United States and very, um, very Diebold emergent. Yeah, And so to me, we're not really thinking in terms of how do we strengthen and connect the world, you know, how do we strengthen and connect our politics? How do we strengthen and connect all of these things that are going on in our world to make us a stronger place? So I don't think that the focus is on that. And so the vocabulary is not really there. So, for instance, if I say spirituality, you know, there's so many images, nobody thinks Oh, connectivity of South will. Not nobody but a lot of people don't think spirituality of, you know, self connection connection to other people in connection to the world. It's more of a vocabulary barrier because we don't have a mainstream set of words for putting this into place and doing it as a group or society. You know, it was a great communicator. If someone gives you the chance, you're able to explain it really well. And I'm like, Holy Yeah, that's the That's the goal. That's the end goal. Well, if I could understand it, anyone can understand it. What I like based on your the third part of your model, the expectations and meeting reality, where do you find whether individuals, leaders or the organization's himself are falling short with their expectation? Is there a common thread there? I think the thing that I see and this is another long discussion. But you know, there's a big discussion right now, especially with some of the people I've talked within higher education about the loss of critical thinking skills. Um, you know when? When I'm thinking critical thinking skills, I'm thinking in terms of how do you look at the bigger picture of things? How do you look at the you know how, how the world interacts with each other and how how people make decisions based off of how broad their view is on. That's in contrast to buy a Neri thinking, which is the more of the US versus them wrong versus right, which I find ironic because you know, when you look at computer systems, it's ones and zeros, so it's very by a Neri quote unquote thinking. And so eso were becoming Mawr buying Mary in our thinking, which I think is why you see so much divisiveness in politics and, you know, people fighting for their one way or the other. And I think that's probably the biggest thing that I have seen. That's a challenge, is how do you How do you bring that to the the discussion or to the table for people whenever they're trying Thio make the things integrated or make things more cohesive? You know, we're really, I think, struggling as a country, at least here in the United States. That way I don't know if I could speak a swell to other country that Yeah, but from what I hear from people, it seems to be a pretty common thread internationally. You know, it It is something that people are, you know, not really working towards, you know? And then when you look at that from a political point of view, what's that gonna look like if your country looks like that? In fact, I was talking on linked in with somebody from Switzerland and they were telling me about their I guess their system. I don't know anything about this, I'll probably butcher it. So if anybody from Switzerland listening, I apologize. But they were staying that they have more than two political system, so you kind of have more choices. Whereas in the United States it's kind of set up Is a violin every system. You're either this or you're that. And if you don't agree with the two, you're pretty much out of luck. And so what does that mean as faras connectivity? You know how How do we take a society and and connect itself to that kind of a system? You know, I got a little bit, but yeah, no, it's not. It's really good because, as you said, it's gonna be a long discussion, but I think it's really good. It brings us to some clarity in what you're teaching and what it is. It makes sense for me, and I believe it would make sense for listeners. And it's helpful is well, is there a connection? Would you say where you say their focus in life? So whether it's the individuals, the worker, the leaders or in the businesses, that they're the lack, they're lacking a focus in life, along with the expectations is that leading to improper expectations and back down into the foundation. So are you able to dig deep to say where this kind of starts? Or is it just, you know, it's gonna be one or the other? You know, it's kind of a challenge because you've...

...got you've got to me There's these two types of discussions have different layers thio, very superficial layer, which is, you know, wrong, bad. And I just I really have had I've always had a very hard time going to that place because to me, you know, if you're talking about trying to build strengthening or building something up, you're not talking about good or bad or wrong or right you're talking about how do we come together? It's people to do something to make an impact or difference. And so when you're and that falls in with the whole critical thinking discussion, and so if you're talking about you know, the political structure and all, it's hard to say because, first of all, you don't know what motivates the people that are running in it, you know? Are their words and actions matching sometimes? No. Sometimes, yes. You know and and so, Plus, it's such a huge machine that I don't know if you could just say, Well, this person is wrong because so many people are involved in that process. How do you know? How do you weed out? You know, the things that are making it broken and the things that are making it strong because it's a bigger system gets the harder it is toe, you know, kind of figure out where the breakdown accountability. Yeah, yeah, so to me, you know, I always tell people, you know, don't judge things, is good or bad or wrong or right Look at it from that that other layer and think about fear, too, because, you know, it's a pretty scary world we're in right now. You know, there's a lot of very dangerous, actual, dangerous things happening. Way have toe, think in terms of Okay, if if people are reacting fight or flight because they're fearful, that's a very different picture than people reacting from a place of critical thinking. Eso you know, to me, I would say that the biggest thing that could benefit is for more and more people toe learn, thes critical thinking skills so that when they're making decisions, they're looking at it from a much broader perspective, you know, because there are so many divisive things right now. And and, you know, when I think of, like, big diversity inclusion Zahra really big discussion right now. And if your focus is on, how do you behave? You know, okay, if our if our goal here is to strengthen the world, which that may not be everybody's goal. But, you know, just speaking generally from the people I work with normally they're wanting to strengthen the world on DSO. If you've got people that are wanting to do that, how do we as, ah person, a group of people decide? Okay, what are our words gonna be? How are we going to manage this, then? It really doesn't matter what color you are. What? What? You believe what your religious affiliations are as long as you all are working towards a common goal that has this foundational element of helpful or foundational element of friendly, everybody can do that. It doesn't matter who you are. Young, old, you know, big, small, whatever. And so the focused in is driven to that word as opposed to the divisive stuff, See? And so that's the challenge is how do you get people to see what that would do and changing our world? I mean, if you if you just think visualized it right now without anything happening, what does that look like for you in the world, as opposed to, you know, the other, You know, it just feels calmer. It feels more connected, you know? Then when you actually do it, you know, it's kind of nice because it does do that. You happen. You as an educator are helping. And you know, if if it's remote or wherever it is, you're able to go. So you're seeing a lot of the bad side. I mean, you said don't use the word bad. Uh, I'm listening. It zits like a habit, though, right? It's something. Yeah, totally. Yeah. You see, some of, um, you see sides of people where they can improve and then seeing the sides where they can improve and seeing those improvements or changes that they bring about themselves, because the model that you showed them or some other tool that they are able to have at their disposal, what brings you the most satisfaction in the work that you're doing. Oh, the most satisfaction is when you see somebody who goes from not understanding it at all to where it finally clicks, because sometimes it can take upwards of a ah year to really figure it out and when they look at you, In fact, the thing I hear the most from people who have have learned the model is it. The two things I hear the most are It's like magic because all of a sudden here's somebody who's been angry or hostile or upset, frustrated all the time, and then all of a sudden it's...

...like, Oh, I see that stuff really isn't going to be the end of my life. I'm safe and secure and the world is okay and I can go from this place of power as opposed to this place of frustration. And the other thing I hear a lot is how come nobody teaches us. I've never heard of this before, and so you know, it's just not something that is taught, really. I think two people, you know, and I like I said, I wasn't taught it growing up. I just happened upon it by reading. Ah, lot of books. I read a lot, a lot, a lot of books. And And there was a common thread in all the books I was reading. And it was like, Wow, this may really be something. You were able to deduce that, Yeah. Regular to make it your own. So I think you call yourself a people in culture partner. Yes. And I think it's It's a very good description of someone. And that seems to be a great description of you. What would you like people to understand about that about you? Well, I think that they don't understand. Not necessarily just the phrase, but understand about the work that you're trying to bring to people. Yeah. Actually, it's funny. You ask that because, uh, you know, I've been doing this for a number of years now, and it was always the question. Okay. What do I call you? What? You know. What do you do? In fact, have a gal who who's She's the president of a no dinner of a mortgage company. And I worked with her for employees, and, uh, she was like she says, I never know how to describe you because I don't really know. You know what? What you do per se. And I said, Yeah, that's a That's a challenge, because that goes back to the whole thing about the vocabulary and that sense of what it feels like to be in that place on for people who have that inherently. While I'm talking, they're gonna be snogging their head, probably as they're listening. Going? Yeah, yeah, I know what she means. But if you don't understand that connective ity, then it's a very amazing thing. Toe watch somebody go from, you know, just being angry at the world or being hostile or frustrated or mad at people all the time to being able to say, You know what, That really doesn't matter. It's not. It's there, they're not attacking me. It's just something that's happening. Connective ity wise and eso I'd say, probably that's the thing that that brings me the most joy. When I can see somebody let go of all that fear or let go of all that frustration or, you know it's you know that mentality and go to Hey, you know it's OK. The world, you know, even though there's challenges out there. I can stay calm and I can use my word and I can make sure my words and actions match. And even if nobody appreciates that, I can always appreciate that in myself. And so I think that's probably the thing that brings you the most joyous being ableto reconnect something you know to that. And it's interesting how you said to get people to understand people and culture partner. It's your friend or the person you're working with because you know some of the jobs like, Oh, he's a lawyer or he's my He's my boss But maybe she finds that you're so kind and you're a partner for her that she you know there's not one specific label that she confined for you, and she finds you enduring and she finds you kind is like this'd is, you know, my friend or whatever. It may be that you know, but she doesn't want to introduce your friend because she has to give you a title, you know, so that someone knows where you come from. So it's interesting how that will play out. Your actually tried a connective ity expert, but that didn't really work. Nobody could even figure out what that was. I was like, Okay, so I've had a number of practice runs on what to call it. So this one seems Toby working very well right now. So because it does, I think better describe, you know that you're you're looking for ways toe integrate people and make them see that we can work together and we can achieve amazing things whenever we are tied together and strengthening things as opposed to being opposed to each other and fighting each other. And so you know that that's the thing you see in all cultures. If you look at the community where people have high connectivity, you know, it's an amazing place to go. But whenever there's a lot of divisiveness and fighting Theune, you know, that's a much different picture, You know, Dr Reid, how do you stay connected, or how do you stay productive and keep going? Ooh, Interesting. Trying connected. I'm a big one for family. I have Ah, wonderful family. I have lots of friends that I care for. And who you know, Really? You know you live in Texas? Very Yeah. No problems there.

Yeah, well, see, I'm not a true Texan. I have to be honest. I I was I'm from Illinois originally, but I've lived in Texas for 30 years, or Mawr. So I do consider myself, you know, kind of a Texan now, although, you know, some of the ones who have been here for three or four generations, you know, may not agree. E have friends who are, you know, have been here for two generations, and, uh, it's yeah, we've enjoyed it and we've lived close toe Austin. We've never lived in Austin, but we've always lived right outside. So which it's a wonderful town. We love Austin so way like the motto keep Austin weird because it does truly exemplify, you know, the community they are. They are really fun group of people who have tried to keep it very authentic. I think so. But yeah, so But then, as far as the productive, you know, I think it's always having some purpose in your life. You know, whether it be a personal or professional, you know, some people are in a position, and I can I can kind of sympathize with this having been raised the way I was that they have to have a job. They have to make money. It's not about enjoying their work. It's about bringing home a paycheck. You have tow, have that. How do you keep your words in place? And how do you keep yourself motivated? And so you know, I've been very blessed to be able to shift out of that kind of a lifestyle into something different. And so that's what I would say to people is, even if you're stuck in a job that you don't really like and you want to make a change and there's something you truly love their you know there's all kinds of paths you can take. You know, you that goes back to that binary versus critical thinking. Binary thinking is I can't do that. Critical thinking is okay. I want to do that. So how do I get there? What steps do I need to take to get there? And so you know, to me, I try to stay productive with things that I love and taking myself down paths that are gonna take me to the things that I like and what to do and what you brought up. The song writing and the photography. I do those pretty much every week just for you know, for fun. You know, just to say, Hey, that's just something I love to dio. And maybe one day it will become You know more than that. But I have Thio think in terms of where would I want that to go? Who do I need to contact to do that? And so you just you never know where your your words gonna take you. You know, in terms of being productive, Do you have a favorite tool or something that you use that it helps you be efficient in your work? It could be your headphones. It could be a pencil. It could be your chair. Is there just something maybe a favorite teddy bear? I don't know, but just something that it helps you, um, keeps you going. It just something that you always go to or just something you need in your Actually, you know, I've never been asked that question before, but interestingly enough, I would have to say that ironically, because I'm in kind of connectivity is my computer because, you know, growing up, we didn't have computers and so you had toe find books you had to go to the library had to search for information. And I've always been an avid reader and and and love to read. And so when the Internet came around, I could find everything. It was like this magic book where you could dio and and read books on it. You could learn about different cultures you could talk to. You know, now you could talk to people in different parts of the world and and and in real time, see, you know what's happening. And so it's always to me, I think exciting toe open up my quote unquote book and and see, you know what? What's out there? What I what? I haven't learned what I you know would like Thio to know about a culture s so that I can better understand it are you know, how do you How would I apply my work in? You're the country you're in there because I've never been there. So I would have to learn through talking to people like you or, you know, learning the culture that way. So it's kind of shocking if we think about the number of people that do not have or who do not have access to a computer yet it's, I mean, there's a whole bunch. There's a whole lot of opportunity left to, um, divulge into or to give other people opportunities. Dr. Reed, what is your number? Maybe even for some of these people that may get onto a computer soon. Your number one top tip for people getting in tow work getting what now into work. So thinking as three young lemonade stand girl or getting your first job at a college, just a a top tip for people getting...

...into work or even changing their career. Maybe they take a program. They said. Maybe I'm in the wrong position. My top tip would be to think about what brings you joy and then come up with at least 10 to 20 ways you could get there and then start researching and looking for the things that are going to take you from where you are to where you want to go and also making sure that you recognize it may not take you where you think you want to go. Because if I had, if I had ever said, Well, I'm going this way and that's the only way I'm going. Uh, then I would have missed out on all the little signs and messages and clues that the world gave me That told me No, go this way. So really, listen to that and research it because I think if you if you look at it just from one place, you're going toe lose it. Because if you're too much, I got a research how to do all this. I gotta find a way, uh, mentally. And you don't listen with that, that heart part or that that visceral part, Then you're gonna miss out on stuff. But if you only do it from the visceral part you're going, Thio miss out Because you're not doing the research and figuring out which way to go, so do both and find find that path that that integrates those two things as best you can. Speaking of missing things or listening to others, is there something that you wished you would have known when you were younger? Oh, you do know now you mean younger, as in in my child. Yeah. I mean, well, usually all advice is good advice. No matter the age. Okay? that's true. I would say the thing that would stick out the most to me is for people who are in high school who are getting ready to go to college. Um, that you carried after the third year. Do what now? To get married after the third year. Yeah, Yeah, yeah, I know. My daughters were always saying, you know, what were you thinking? I was like, I don't know. I was, uh you know, I didn't I don't know what you know. Back in those days, people just got married younger. So were you and your husband ready for your Children to come home and say, Hey, Mom, Dad, third year were way. We're always like, you know what way I had that in place. Young because, you know, not worrying about what? Didn't you know I wanted? You know, I always wanted my kids to say, Look, I found the path that was right on. Then we helped them get there, which is always nice. But, you know, if you don't have parents or people that are there to guide you, then to me, you know, that's the thing I would say is go out and find mentors go learn about things and other people because even if your parents can't or won't help you or you're in a position where it's all about, just make a living, you can make a living. But then go find other things that bring you joy and try to find a navigate your way from where you are, where you just have to make money to the place where you can can do whatever you love to do. Because if you're good at making them doing the hard work of those you know, retail jobs or things like that, then if you have that work ethic to do that, then that can lead you directly to where you really want to be in the end. And I think the biggest challenge when you're younger is that you're so impatient for it to happen now that it's hard to see that if you work on something now, it's gonna be, you know, five years from now you're gonna have a different place. And I didn't you know there were things I didn't know and nobody taught it to me, and nobody helped me learn them, and I had to go out and search for them. And so I think that eyes something that you know, three younger generation, especially that population that doesn't have somebody saying Hey, here's where you need to go Here's what you need to dio, you know, take advantage of you Say, gosh, I wanna be a nurse. Well, I'd say go be a candy striper. Go meet with nurses. Go try to find a job somewhere that's gonna build that that picture of who you wanna be. And if you don't know who you wanna be yet go and explore that. Say, what do I What do I love to dio? In fact, it's going back to my spirituality roots. There's a guy named Parker Palmer who probably a lot of people know on he. Actually, I was reading one of his books and he said, Um, I think about what you loved when you were a child child and then use that kind of as your basis for deciding what vocation you want to go towards. Because if you love building things, you know, if you if you love getting in there and working on cars, if you loved,...

...you know, doing your Legos or building. You know things, architect. You know what? What things did you love to do is the child, And then see if you can translate that into the things that you could love to do is an adult. So that's something that that I read that really stuck with me when I was going through the process. Yeah, I heard that from someone not too long ago that it's something between when the ages of one and 10. Some something that you that you did a lot of when you're a kid. Trouble. I have trouble remembering. Yeah, I also wondered, too. Like, I think. Why didn't people tell me these good bits of advice that I'm hearing now? But I'd like to go through life and see if I just actually had my ears plugged. And I just wasn't listening. Yeah, all of that advice was around and circulating that we have, but it just we weren't really ready. Thio, listen. Yeah, well, in this, because even in high school, you're You know, this sounds really weird and this will be my speech coming out again, but your brain isn't completely formed until you're like in your twenties and so it's very difficult for you toe overcome. You know, the fact that you're, you know, thinking Okay, I'm having fun. I love life and all of that. But you know, that's the hard thing, too, is there's not one set of things you could say because everybody's life experience is so different. You know, there's some people who are in poverty. I did a little work and head start in Montgomery, Alabama, of all places, and I loved it. It was probably one of my favorite work experiences, because the way they had the head starts back then Well, they were right in middle of the the lower income housing the they used to call the projects. Eso I'd have to go in to these projects and drive in, and I pretty much be the only, uh, Caucasian person there. But they treated me so wonderfully, I never felt, uh, like I wasn't, you know, appreciate it or I never I never felt in danger, which was ironic because there were a lot of shootings going on in these areas and all, but, you know, it was just it was such a good experience for me toe have because I got to see another way that people live that was so different than my way of living that it gave me a different perspective and empathy for it. And so, you know, I would also tell people to travel a much as they can, because when you when you meet people from different cultures, you know, like your dio you you do have a different perspective of the world because it's not all about what you learned growing up. So you know, that's another thing that young people could dio. I think to really expand their their views of the world and how they do things in terms of experiences. Dr Reid, in your work that you do now, what is maybe a mistake, one of the biggest mistakes, if you would allow us to know, but something that you've learned from that steak or one of those mistakes that maybe it's hard to do a bit. I have learned that I cannot change people e hours working with somebody and teaching model, but I cannot change people, you know. And when it's I think that's a that's a really hard thing for people to know because, well, sometimes we This has been my experience is when you couldn't back in the day when I was first kind of learning this model, Um, you used to use the model almost as a safety blanket, but it wasn't truly ingrained, because the way I could tell when somebody has ingrained the model is when it doesn't matter what other people do or think. Because a lot of times were using it to say, Okay, if I do this model, I'm a really good person. And therefore everybody's gonna like me. So I'm going to do the model for that reason. And then somebody doesn't like you Well, totally blows you out the water because you think I'm doing everything I'm supposed to be doing. And and so I think you know, I've learned over the years that, you know, it's kind of like that's why I like to call it a toolbox is because I'm not coming in to fix people. I'm not coming in to change people. I'm coming and just say, Hey, here's some skill sets you can use if you want them to change the entire perspective you have on the world so that you don't have to be frustrated all the time, so you don't have to be angry all the time and and you get to choose whether you use it or not. So that's the big one. I think I had to learn was not being able to fix everybody, you know? So Dr Lynette read. Is there any parting advice that you would be able to give to my listeners?...

Getting into work may be frustrated with their work, grinding their wheels, not very certain of their place in life. Maybe their expectations are too high, maybe too low. Their focus is not where it should be. Maybe they don't even have a foundation from which to stand. Is there any advice that you can offer to some of my listeners? Oh, wow, you know, that's that's I've had that question before, and it's really hard in some ways because people are so different that it's really hard to say there's this one thing that's gonna help people. But I think what I find is that, uh, people who are willing to look at that broader picture have those critical thinking skills to say the world isn't black or white, Yes or no wrong or right. There are shades of gray all within that, and and learned that how that works, how those shades of grays work, that that's probably the best starting point, because to me it's about perspective. One of the biggest examples I used for that is I can't My mind's gone blank. It's too early in the morning. But there was a psychologist, too. It's in the Holocaust, probably a lot of the people who know what I'm talking about. Well, no, I remember saying, but, um, he wrote a book about his Holocaust experiences and as a psychologist, and he said, Um, he said that there were two types of people he know just in the concentration camps. Just get a little dark for your question, but I think it's a really good people that there were the people who would share their last crumb of bread toe help keep somebody alive, and there were people who would hoard their bread and not share it with anybody. And the point that I took from that was that even in the most horrific, you know, situations, you have a choice. You know, even if everybody around you is dying which is the worst possible scenario you could almost think of. In many ways, um, there is a choice you have and how you do things. And so, to me, that would be kind of my advice to people is recognize you have more than one choice you know you have. You have many choices in how you treat people, how you make choices about where you want to be in your career, all of those things. And so I think, in terms off, what are the thousands of options I have and which one resonates with me to get me where I want to get? So you know, that's probably the best one I could give us. Far as for that volume of people you know, no, it's right in line with what you're saying because that binary way of thinking it's it's either this or that. However, we wanted to define it, and no one really fits there. So when people start to think, well, I'm either this or that when I'm not this or that, then where do I fit and then they're discouraged, and that leads to a path of exactly self destruction of sorts being lost in this world. But I think what you're saying is people have purpose and there's there's a good it's a good, good place for them to be. It's just they need to find it for themselves. We can't just tell everyone what it is. They right? Right? Thank you very much, Dr. Lynette Read. Where can people reach you? Well, the best way is you can go to my website, which is www expectations to the number two reality dot com. It's or you can just google Dr Lynette read on, then also by, uh, I dio monthly writing with M p u G, which is a project management organization. So if you Google Dr Lynette read M p u G, which may be easier for typing purposes. Uh, it'll pull up a lot of my information there, and then it also has all of the articles I've written. So if you're more if you're interested in learning more about some of the work I do and kind of the perspectives, that's a good place to go to read some of the articles in all so a couple of different ways. My final question for you, Dr Reid, Why do you work? Why do I work? Well, I work for purpose for, um, for financial. You know, we all want to make money. Um, and I work because I do believe that the work that I do does help to strengthen the people that I am around. And so that is something that is obviously very important to me. Otherwise, I wouldn't be in this career. Dr. Lynette Read...

...educator, author, podcaster, photographer, songwriter and very helpful leader in her profession. Thank you very much for your time. Thank you. I appreciate you having me on. Thank you for listening to this episode of why we work with Brian V. Be sure to subscribe, Follow and share with others so they too can be encouraged in their work. E hope that you have yourself a productive be a joyful day in your work.

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