WhyWeWork BrianVee
WhyWeWork BrianVee

Episode 27 · 1 year ago

#26 Coach Michael Taylor Entrepreneur, Author, Motivational Speaker BrianVee Whywework

ABOUT THIS EPISODE

The following is from Coach Michael Taylor's website (https://www.coachmichaeltaylor.com/): 

Coach Michael’s Profile linkedin.com/in/coachmichaeltaylor  

Websites coachmichaeltaylor.com (Blog) 

creationpublishing.com (Company Website)

 joypassionprofit.com (Company Website)  

Phone 713-303-2067 (Mobile) 

Email info@ancwm.com 

Twitter coachmichaelt  

Coach Michael Taylor is an entrepreneur, author (8 books), motivational speaker and radio and TV show host who has dedicated his life to empowering men and women to reach their full potential by transforming their lives from the inside out. He knows first hand how to overcome adversity and build a rewarding and fulfilling life and he is sharing his knowledge and wisdom with others to support them in creating the life of their dreams. He is President & CEO of Creation Publishing Group that is a company that specializes in creating programs and products that empower men to embrace a new paradigm of masculinity that supports them in being great husbands and fathers and supports them in creating meaningful and rewarding lives. He was featured in the Amazon.com bestselling book Motivational Speakers America with legendary speakers Les Brown and Brian Tracy and he has won numerous awards for his dynamic speaking style. Public speaking is his passion and being on stage brings him tons of joy. He is the host and producer of two TV Channels on the Roku Network, Joy Passion & Profit, which is a show designed to empower entrepreneurs to build companies that change the world, and, Shatter The Stereotypes, which empowers men of color to live extraordinary lives. In addition, he hosts two podcasts of the same names and they can be found on most podcast platforms like Spotify and iTunes. Most importantly he has been blissfully married for 17 years to the woman of his dreams and he is a proud father to three grown children whom he is extremely proud of. When he isn’t writing or speaking you’ll find him checking out the latest movies or listening to old school 70’s and 80’s soul music and contemporary jazz. He considers himself to be an irrepressible optimist with a passion for the impossible and he believes there has never been a better time to be alive on this planet than right now.

Welcome to why we work, with your host, Brian V as. He speaks to people like you from all over the world, as we together dive deeper into our motivations, struggles, joys, seemingly missteps, hopes, warnings and advice which will be an encouragement to us all to get up, get going and keep on working. Working is tough, but working is good. Now here is your host to why we work, Brian V. A Brian V of why we work. Today I had the great pleasure of speaking with coach Michael Taylor. When you think of coach, you think of someone who is leading, and Mr Michael Taylor is leading. He is an author of eight books, working on several more. He is a motivational speaker. He not only motivates people, but he gets down to the heart of issues and showing people forgiveness, love and gratitude. I very much enjoyed this conversation today. It may you clean something from it as we listen to my conversation with coach, my Michael Taylor. I'm Brian V and this is why we work and I have the great pleasure of speaking with coach Michael Taylor. Good day find sir, hello, Brian, how you doing, my friend? I'm doing well. That I just said, you must have some things going on if you're if you have coach in front of your name, because anyone who has ever played a sport and even has some admiration for maybe their kids coach or something. For you to have coach, you must have some real things going on. Well, here's the here's the thing behind that work. Coach. There's a wonderful book out called The Passion Test, and the intention of the book is to help you identify that which you are truly passionate about. And after I did that, that test, what I came to find was I love teaching. I absolutely love teaching how to do things. And you know, I'm an author, written a book, so that's a form of teaching. So when I started my company I needed a Tagline, I needed a brand, and teacher Michael Taylor doesn't sound nearly as cool as coach Michael Taylor. So so I'm in that life coaching space and that's why I use the term coach. Michael Taylor. I love it, I really love it. And knowing a little bit about you from your bio and again I say it you and I we met. You linkedin. I think it's a great resource. But going through some of the things that you are doing and have done, I think you you hold the name rather well. So codd great grant and you know, it's interesting. What I found really interesting is most of my life all of my friends, for whatever reasons, generally call me my first and last night Michael Taylor, Taylor I come here. I don't know why that stuck, but most people have always called me Michael Taylor, and so when I came up with the brand coach Michael Taylor, just kind of fit, you know, still fits. Just stick kind of fit coach Michael Taylor and adds like it seems Michael Taylor's One syllable and but you got another syllable on there. There's a few, but it seems like one. Know it works. It works really well. Can coach, can you bring his back? I know we you just mentioned. You're an author of eight books. You have a podcast going, your motivational speaker. You you, as you opened up with me a few moments ago, you're trying to get through the noise and and resting on the the shore settlement of what's to come after all this noise. But before you got here, how did it all start? When did you begin working? When did you get your first job? How old were you? What was your motivation then? Well, a couple of things. First of all, I've known that I wanted to be an entrepreneur since I was ten years old. When I was ten years old, this is a conversation I actually had with my Grandpa I'll never forget. I walked up to it said, GRANDPA, when I grow up I'm going to be rich, and he asked me how are you going to do that? I said I'm going to own my own company. He said, wow, that's a great goal to have, he says. Now, if you're going to be rich, he said, I'm going to tell you two things you have to learn to be rich, he says. Number One, if you're going to be rich, you have to learn to think like rich people. He said, the only difference between rich people and poor people is how...

...they think. And secondly, he said, if you're going to be rich, you have to learn to listen, he said, because rich people will tell you how they got rich. It's your responsibility to learn from them so that you can become rich. And it is those two lessers that have really stuck with me in my entire life now. When I was fourteen years old, I was walking to school and I happened to overhear this conversation between this owner of this company and his mcchannic and they were screaming and cursing and fighting because the mechanic didn't want to clean the floors. He said, my job is the fix. Is a motorcycle shop. He said, my job is to fix the DON mottlecycle. I'm not here to clean up. Well, I heard that as I was walking by. So I walk into the store. I talked to the on I said, hey man, I heard the conversation. I said, guess what, I can clean your floor for you and fourteen years old. Fourteen years and fourteen years old, sir, I can clean your for yeah, I said. I said, if you hire me, I can clean you thought. He said, well, how much more you charge? I said I have no idea, but here's the thing, I said, let me clean your garage and then you pay me what you think is worth at fourteen. Fourteen years old. So I have to go to school. I told him I come back after school to clean this garage. When I come back and by the time I finished cleaning that garage you could have had dinner on that it was so clean. So the guy looked at me and he kind of smiled. It's really impressed. He said, I tell you what, I'll pay you five bucks an hour. Now guess what, this one thousand, nine hundred and seventy four minimum wage was a dollar sixty an hour. If guys pay me five bucks an hour, fourteen years old now only worth a couple hours, right. But he had three friends that also own garages. So guess what? I now ended up having three other clients at fourteen. So that was my first jumping to entrepreneurship. Now a couple other things that I love. Number One, I love music, so when I got to high school I started my own company being a DJ. I bought my own equipment. I'd go around doing parties and dad penses and proms and so what. In High School I was making a ton of money. I also love installing car stereos. That was a passionate mind. I had a four hundred dollar car with a twelve hundred stereo and so I would install car stereos for my friends and they will tell there for you and I had a steady stream of customers coming in. So I've always had this passion for entrepreneurship and that's how it all begins. I think I'm still stuck in that. You were fourteen, one thousand nine hundred and seventy something. You look like you're about thirty five. I'll be sixty this year. Well, you're doing well for yourself. So you're talking about the motivation you had, or even the desire you had to be rich. But where did that come from? Like, is there someone that you knew, something that you experience? What was this? This drive coming for Sushi from ten years old? Right? Well, here's the thing. First of all, I believe every human being has a divine purpose. There's something that we show up with that's NRDNA, and if we're blessed enough to figure out what that is, life becomes magical. So I was born in an intercity projects a couple of gristly Texas, to a single mom with six kids. We were basically the poster children from party back in the S, and you'll hear people sometimes say that when they were young they didn't realize they were poor. I realize. We report and I didn't like it. I and like it at all and I remember having conversations with my mom. I said, mom, whatever it takes, I'm going to get out of this situation, I'm going to buy you a house. You know, all those things we said. We hear people say. I said, I'm going to get out of this situation, I am not going to be poor. And my mom used to tell me, she says, Michael, if you want something badly enough, there is no one or no thing that can keep you from having it. Accept Yourself. So, if you want to get out of this situation, your first that the first thing you got to do is you got to use your mind. She says you're smart, she says you got to have a positive mental attitude and she said if you want to bad enough, you can do it. So that foundation, I believe, is what started this whole entrepreneurial purposeful filment for me, because I believe once again, that there is a divine energy in a universe. You can call it whatever you want to call it, you can call the guide, you can call you and you can call it whatever you want, but there is something that we as human...

...beings have access to that, when we tap into it. Nothing is impossible and fortunately for me, I was blessed to be able to tap into that and it is what has allowed me to accomplish things that I've accomplished so far. Did you ever buy a house, crea mom, not yet. Still working on still. Thing is, you know, you brought me way back because I grew up in not with six or five brothers and sisters, but when we were younger I was in the poorest part of my hometown and I always said to my mom, mom, I want to, you know, be successful enough to buy you a home. Probably said a couple other things, but I always said by our home. My mom passed away this February and that now I find that, you know, a little bit like I felt short. They're a little bit, but it resignates with me that you had the experience growing up and you're tapping into something that you believe is bigger than yourself. Well, but here's a beautiful part about that, though. You know, when we make those intentions, you know and you know we all would love our moms. We want to do great things for our MOMS. But see, my mom, like most MOMS, very specially unique and she is the reason I am why I am again my mom, single parents, six kids, poverty, the whole nine yards. But you know, I really thought about this and I can't remember a single time when I heard my mom complaint about me. Despite our situation, she had this sense of optimism and possibility. That is I guess it's if there's a resiliency gene. She passed it on to me and I'm so grateful for that. And so, even though I haven't been able to buy her the house yet, I have done something that, from her own words, basically fulfills the fulfillment that she would have received if she bought the house. For example, when I was in the eleventh grade, I dropped out of high school. I dropped out of high school because I convinced myself that I could get rich setting vacuum cleaner. Optimistic then, too, I go to the seminar right in this guy, and you know I'm in is one of these motivational seminars and these multiple level marketing. Sell the vacuum cleanland, make all this money. I just knew I could do it right. Well, bad choice, but what I learned from that, even though I never sold a single vacuum cleaner I learned that I was willing to take risk and as an entrepreneur, obviously that's a huge part of that taking risk. But I knew intuitively, somehow I was going to make it so what I dropped out of high school, couldn't find a job for about a year, but I still maintain this positive at to. Fortunately for me, I landed a excuse me, I landed a job with the building supplies at nineteen. Climb the corporate ladder pretty quickly. As a matter of fact, I became the youngest man in the history of this particular company and one of only two black managers ever in an eighty seven year history of the coming. And so when I became manager and I bought my first house, I remember inviting my mom over and saying, mom, I made it, and the look on her face, in the feeling that she gave me when she embraced me and said, baby, I'm so proud of you, knowing where I'd come from and at the beginning, when I first started working for that company, she didn't believe that I would be able to make manager because, number when I was black, number two, because I had, in Leventh great education. She said nobody's going to pay you that kind of money without the degree. I said, mom, trust me, I know what I'm doing. I knew that I could do it. So I climb the corpor ladder and again I became managers at twenty two. But just seeing her face, the pride when she walked into my house for the very first time. It's wasn't buying her house, but I guarantee the feeling was the same her being so proud of me. So, as you congratulations to we just bought our house like three weeks ago and I would have loved to have shown my mom. It's one of those things right. Yeah, absolutely. I just so proud of that that she was able to see the end. and not to mention the fact that whenever I write a book, you know, she he's my mom's just all over the place with their...

...friends, you know, bragging and so for them. And here's a really amazing story, my mom is part of this organization called Easton Stars. I don't know if you for Mel with it, as it's a female fraternity type thing where women get together and they they do conferences and stuff like that. Well, she's a part of this. Well, she went to one of these conferences in there, you know, probably one thousand five hundred people in this conference and there's a lady there that she's a good friend of there. They've been friend for years and so for some reason or somehow they started having this conversation. She's a college professor and so they're having this conversation and the college professor tells my mom about this amazing book that she's Reading For black men, and so my mom asked her what's the time of the book and she said Shattering Black male stereotypes, and my mom went my son wrote that, and the ladies like no way. She said yes, she said that's my son, and I remember what she got back and she called him. She's laughing and she's like I can't believe that. Actually, what a wonderful thing. Hey, that's very cool. So how did you go from manager into, you know, more of your role now? So after after dropping out of high school, Getting promoted and and then you're starting to find your none of your snuts starting, but you're getting into your groove of starting to write. Did you write at before? It the eleven here's the amazing story. So at the age of twenty three I'm living the American dream right. I got the house, the wife, the two point five kids and all of that. By the age of Twenty Nine, my American dream turned into the American nightmare. I want to divorce, bankruptcy, a foreclosure, a deep stated depression. I was actually homeless for two years, living out of a car, and so, during the darkest period of my life, I received a miracle. I was sitting up late one night because I was too depressed to sleep, and I remember sitting at the edge of my bed looking across the room in my bookshelf, when I happened to notice that every book on my bookshelf had something to do with getting rich or making money. Now, remember what I said about me wanted to be an entrepreneur when I was ten years old. Well, all my books on my bookshelf was what my grandfather taught me about listening. He taught me to listen and that's how I listened, by reading these books. So I'm looking at these books, noticing that every book has something to do with getting rich and making money, and all of a sudden this question just popped in my head. Michael, what if you took all the energy and effort you've used in trying to get rich and simply figure out how to be happy. Hmm, that's simple. Single question literally changed and saved my life in an instant. When I asked myself that question, something in me shifted. I couldn't explain it in words, but all of a sudden my depression lifted and I had this amazing clarity that I was going to be able to rebuild my life and it was going to become extraordinary. Intuitively, I just knew it. I just it was. It was a transcendent experience that had nothing to do with the intellect. It was completely spiritual. Something just shift shifted, and so I stopped reading books on getting rich, in making money, and I started reading books on philosophy and psychology and spirituality and metaphysics and personal development and I wanted some amazing journey of transformation. And so after a few years, because it took a few years, I started rebuilding my life and I got really involved with the Anthony Robbins motivational movement, if you will. You know, walking on the hot coals and doing neural linguistic programming, N LP, and so it got. I started putting my life back together, and so things were gone well, but there was something missing that I couldn't put my finger on. And I it's interesting because again, I had always been motivating, so motivation wasn't the problem. And so here I am with Anthony Robins, who was primarily motivating. But there was something deeper than I couldn't figure out. And then I read a book by a guy named John Bradshaw, and then this book he talked about he's talking about emotional healing and he said the key to emotional healing was creating an interpersonal bridge with another human being and he said the fastest way to...

...create that bridge was through some sort of therapy in which you are able to connect with another human being to allow you to emotionally heal. And when I read that I realized it's something. There was something there for me that I needed to look at, and so I gained the courage to go to therapy and during therapy I learned that I had an extremely abusive childhood. As a matter of fact, if you take the worst childhood you could imagine and multiply by ten, that was my childhood. Now I mentioned it. I was one in an intercity projects with six kids with my mom, but when I was six years old, my mom had to take me to live with my dad for a while because one of my oldest sisters got really sick, and so I want to live with my dad, who I really didn't remember because he had left when I was really young. Yeah, and we moved in with his mother, other who was obviously my grandmother, and she was literally the grandmother from Hell and she literally hated me. She did, she just hated me number one. Anytime she would say anything bad about my mom, I would defend my mom and she would get disc inted these violent rages. Right. So, anyway, well, on what this therapist and I'm talking about some of the trauma that I went through as a child. She asked me, you know, she says, well, Mike, you know, how are you doing? Well, I had created this defense mechanism and at the fifth mechanism was everything's great. I hid behind this mask of Mr Nice Guy, everything's great, but beneath that I was really in a lot of pain and this therapist helped me move through and heal a lot of that pain and in doing that and doing that inner work, that healing work, I figured out what was missing. Because when I was doing all that emotional, I mean a motivational stuff, I really hadn't tapped into my heart, yeah, and my feelings, and so what I was able to do through therapy was to connect the dots there. That's was and it is, to heal some stuff, to be happy because, as I had mentioned in my question about stop reading books about getting rich and just figure out how to be happy. That was the goal. And as a result of going through therapy and some other processes, I was able to accomplish that goal, which is too simply be happy. And so in doing that work and getting happy and being joyful, I said, you know, I've got a share of the lessons that I've learned with others, and that's when I begainst. I started writing in my late S. I started writing books. You didn't start writing until your S, Yep, and I didn't even know that I was a writer. I never knew I was a rider. And here's an interesting thing. The promat reason I started writing books was because I had joined toastmasters as a public speaker and I fell in love with public speaking and I was trying to figure out how to get speaking gates. Well, one way to get speaking gigs is to be an author. So I wrote a book to get something to get speaking gigs. That's pretty amazing. I'm just thinking of you know, I our past or similar. I think it's kind of heartwrenching to go to, say, a parents home where you're not wanted and you have someone also who who hate you and as a six as a six year old child, having nowhere else to go and being hated at the same time and not knowing the world that's out there and how to get out of that situation. It's, you know, the ability tating, it's encapsating, it's you know, it's like a jail, right. You don't know how to escape and there's no wonder that you wouldn't. I think the word would be love, right. You probably had the love from your mother and then going to the place that you couldn't make that connection. You wanted to be happy, you had some unresolved issues based on the lack of love that no one there gave you and they gave you everything else but and for it to be a relationship from hell, I can only imagine. So I appreciate you coming out of that and you know, those are things that you know, it's like losing someone or memories from the past. You'll still remember those things, but it depends on where your guide it towards. So I really appreciate you being able to come up out of that. What was what was your you go ahead.

Well, here's the thing again, and for the listeners who are watching, is because we've all experienced trauma and adversity in our last it's just part of life. And again, I have been through some of the darkest, darkest periods that anyone can go through. But I come back to my belief in that belief is purpose, as difficult and it's painful as because I was there for seven years, from six to thirteen, was when I went through what I call my seven years of hell, and that's what it was and again, as painful and it's difficult as it was, what I can now see in retrospect, as a result of all the deep work that I've done and healing and growing, what I can see is the perfection even in that adversity. There's a wonderful book out by guy named Tim Kelly. Tim Kelly called true purpose, and in the book he talks about what he calls the sacred wound. And what he says is that each of us, as human beings, will experience something that in some way shapes our destiny in a way. And he says, you know, it doesn't have to be a traumatic physical experience. He says for some people that sacred womb could be your father telling you that they're disappointed in you. MM. But what happens is something happens and then we make a decision that there's something wrong with us, that maybe we're not lovable. And he said that wound, that sacred wound, if we can figure out what that WOM is and heal that womb, it will release us from all the pain and all the disconnection we felt, but it will open us up to understanding the divine purpose in that wound. Because in that wound, as a result of that womb, I became extremely independent, I became my the fence mechanism was my way of coping was by being smart. From first grade to seventh grade when I was there, in that seven years of Hail, I was a complete straight a student, absolutely brilliant, because my mom said the way to get back to her was by doing good in school. So that sacred womb of me being separated from my mom, which psychologist will tell you that's where abandonment issues start. Well, for me, that's where the abandonment issue started for me because in that moment that my mom left me, I made a decision that people who love you leave you, and it was that decision for a long time, feeling that was driving all my relationships and it was the reasons why I couldn't fully connect with others in relationships. It was the reason why I went through a divorce. Excuse me, because, deep down inside I believed that people who loved you would leave you, and so what I would do is I would do everything in my power to keep people in relationship with me, and the term we would use is I was very code dependent. I didn't know how to put my emotional needs first because I was always trying to take care of others needs to keep them in relationship with me. And so by healing that sacred wound, by getting in touch with the negative emotions that were trapped inside of me, through therapy, which I talked about earlier, it freed me from that pain, it freed me from that shame, it awakened in me that divine part of me that, and I'm going to get a little wool here, for are you, but that part of me that knew that all of that pain was there for purpose, that those seven years of Hell was part of the divine plan. And so when I came to that understanding, and as I came to that understanding, what I recognize now is that this divine energy, this divine intelligence that I'm talking about is love, okay, and so my belief is that there is but one presence and one power in the universe. There's no negative energy in the universe, there's no negative beings that causes us to do bad things. There's just this energy of love. And when...

...we connect to that energy of love, then we can see things through a whole different Lens. And so for me, that Lens of love allows me to see those seven years of hell, as painful as they were, through the Lens of love, through the Lens of this loving presence saying, I know this is difficult right now, but there's a purpose, there's a reason behind it, so you just hold on and eventually you'll see why you had to go through this. Now, at the beginning of our conversation, I mentioned that I believe in the breakdown breakthrough principle and I really believe that because it's a universal lobby. And so for me, my breakdown period, those seven years of hell, my breakdown period, were my going through the divorce and bankruptcy and foreclosure and living out of a car for two hundred years. Those are some pretty major breakdowns in life right but what I can say with absolute certainty is that if I had to do my life over again, I wouldn't change a thing, because if I left out any part of it, I wouldn't be who I am today. I wouldn't be the man that I am today, I wouldn't be able to do the things that I do today, I wouldn't have the compassion for others that I have today. So again, I really believe that, as we look at society as a whole, we're in that breakdown breakthrough period. Are we're in that breakdown period which is part of the larger divine breakdown breakthrough principle. Our country and our world is in major breakdown right now and it's really uncomfortable for a lot of people. But I'm absolutely certain that this breakdown is preparing us as a species for a major breakthrough coach Michael, in your world of love, which I agree with, where is forgiveness? Where do your place forgiveness in this equation of how you're able to look back and how we should look back? And in the world today? Where is forgiveness? And all of this? Well, if you'll accept my belief that, as human beings, were energetic beings, we're spiritual beings. Where we're spiritual beings having a human experience, not human beings having a spiritual experience. So at our core, at our essence, is spiritual. If we're holding on to any negative energy, being hate, anger, frustration, negative, if we're holding on to any of those negative energies internally, it wanted, hurts, it keeps US separate from the love that we truly are. So when we learn to forgive, learning to forgive, give allows us to release any negative energy that we may behold, that we may be holding on towards someone or something else. So forgiveness is never about the other person. Forgiveness is always about US releasing negative energy that's inside of us, and in doing so we become free. Now, I don't remember why I read this, but it's a pretty powerful statement, and so when I was in those seven years of Hail that I was talking about with my grandmother, I was actually sexually abused by a male family friend and it was that abuse that sort of set all of my insecurities in motion. And so when I started going through this healing process, I know I have to forgive it, not for him but for me, and so, through a series of processes, I allowed myself to feel the hurt, anger, the sadness as a result of his violation. And someone one said that you know you've truly healed when you can go to the person that hurt you and say thank you. Now, I never had a chance to go to this guy and say that and I probably never would have said it to him MMM, but I am able to see those events and, in a spiritual way, say thank you, because those painful experiences is experiences actually brought me a gift, and I know that that may be difficult to grasp, especially when you start talking about child sexual abuse. It's a horrific thing, but again, if...

...we can see it through a spiritual lens, there's a gift. There was a gift in it for me, and so learning to forgive and letting go of all the negative energy is the way that we become free. Because Wayne Dire. You Know Wayne Dire? I do not. Yeah, Wayne Dar is an author who for years I read his work and he passed away a couple of years ago. And Wayne Dyer is the guy who I would consider my most important mentor when it comes to how I think the way that I think, because when I was in my early twenties, I started reading Wayne drest books and one of the things he said was, as a human being, you have within you the capacity to do anything any other human being has ever done, and if it hasn't been done, you can be the first. Now why? And I happened to be a white guy that I just admired, but when I read his books as a person who happens to be black, there was something in his words that I really, really resonated with, and I realized that it had nothing to do with my ethnicity. What he was talking about was the deeper essence of who I am as a human being, and it was that mindset that has allowed me to far exceed what society says a young Black Guy went only an eleventh day great education could accomplish. Okay, so these lessons that I've learned. That's where I got the lesson about when you can go to someone that hurts you and say thank you, you know you've healed from it. But Wayne Dyer said this. He says, you know, have you ever known someone that dies from a snake bite? And most people said sure, you know it's people who die from snake bite. He Says No, he says no one has ever died from a snake bike. He says you die from the poisoners and not the bite. MMM. And so healing is a way of getting that poison out of you. It's a way of releasing the poisons. The initial bite obviously hurts, but that's not what kills you. It's the poison. So holding on to negative energy is poison, and that's why it's so important to forgive. It allows you to release the poisons. I heard someone one say it. He was referring to marriage, but it just the key to marriage is forgiveness. But I'm sure, I'm certain that can stretch for any relationship. The key to any relationship is forgiveness. Yeah, I agree, and I've been blissfully married for the past eighteen years, happily married, but I mean been together for twenty years but, like I said, it's been an interesting journey to say the least, but through some really deep emotional, psychological and spiritual healing. I get that and to me the cool thing about relationships, once you deal with your own stuff, is how you can get to a place where forgiveness almost doesn't happen. Because here's the thing. Why do people fight in relationships? Is a simple reason. Why. We always while we fight in relationships, and we fight because of the need to be right. MMM, it's that's so. Yeah, we fight because of the need to be right. M and so one of the things that I learned from when dire is the willingness and the ability to not have to be right. Right. So when my wife does something that just irritates the shit out of me, you just like, we'll see, I don't have to be right about how I feel about that to go to her and say Blah, blah, blah, Blam, I you shouldn't none. Now you know, the one thing we don't want to do is to not how we feel right. So if she does something that upsets me, I could authentically say how it felt for me, what was true for me, without attacking her without having to be right to prove my point, but just by being honest with how it landed for me and what I'm experiencing. When you're able to do that in relationships, relationships are amazing. They're heard, but with forgiveness and makes forgiveness easier...

...to write when I wasn't always you don't always have to be right. So, coach, when you started to write and you're in toast masters and you started to the incline to your career, what was the what was the most difficult part into getting the motivation into this new form of life that you were venturing into? The most difficult part my struggle, and I still have this struggle today. Actually, my struggle is the my inability and unwillingness to ask for help. It's one of the most powerful lessons that I've learned and I'm still I still struggle with today, to this day. Is it a is that a like a pride issue? Or is it you don't want to spend the money, you want to just nothing at all? It's just a part of me that and again, I can I can trace it back to six years old, having to take care of and defend myself. Yeah, okay, so there's a part of me that that is always in that mode of I can handle anything that comes my way. Okay, so that's a gift and a curse at the same time, because if I don't allow others to be in support of me and I can't truly create true connection. And so, to this day, I still work on seeking support, I still work on being vulnerable and just being okay with me. It's not a there was a time in my life when there was a lot of shame that drove that. The shames no longer there, but I can't acknowledge that that's still an issue that I work with. It's something that, again, not ashamed of anymore, doesn't really disrupt my life, but if we're talking about growth, it's an area that I'm always aware of, and so I now have a support system, some amazing men and women in my life who, when I catch myself in that space, I can call them up and say, Hey, I just want to talk to you about this, which, you know, seven years ago, something that I couldn't do, but that that was the real struggle that I had at the beginning, simply being willing to seek support. What would you say is your expertise? Now, what is what is the thing that brings you most joy in your ability to do whether it's helping men or women relationships speaking? What is the thing that it really drives you to keep on going? Well, as I mentioned, I believe everyone has a divine purpose and one of our purposes is to find out and discover what our gifts are, because we all have unique gifts and talents within us if we're willing to tap into them. Too. Of My gifts, writing and speaking. I'm absolutely certain that these are gifts from something great better than myself. My ability to write. I've written a book a year for the past five years, currently writing three books simultaneously. I have this gift. It's it's a gift. When I'm speaking on stage, there's something that takes over me that I can't explain in words. It's like I get out of the way and this energy, this intelligence, takes over and I just light up on a state and I'm able to communicate ideas and stories and concepts and ways that people get it and it supports them and transforming their lives. And so my tagline is empowering others to transform their lives from the inside out, because I believe everything begins in mind and if we can change our mindsets, we can change our lives. And we can't change our lives until we change the inner processes, the thoughts, the belief that we have about who we are in the world around. And so again, my my gift is the ability to share information with others that support them and transforming their lives. You mentioned a few times, and I think this is it's a touchy subject, but being black or I'm being white, or however things are defined. I think I read that you speak to to anyone, but also help empowering black men to see their purpose. In your experience, would you say, because...

...you're saying getting through the noise, that you know how much similarity is there between black and white in US having the same problems, in need the same encouragement and need the same motivation than the same mentors? How much in your experience? What are you finding? That's it's similar or it's not similar and there's a difference and we should be up in arms. What are you finding? Well, first and foremost, we have to understand our let me just put this way. My belief, this is Michael Taylor's belief. Yeah, that their three worldviews. US mailie with can wilber, by chance, kN wiber, he's the philosopher guy, really deep thinker gay, and he said there are three world views. There's what he calls and ethnocentric worldview, as a human centric worldview, and is a COSMO centric worldview. Most people see the world through an ethnocentric worldview, which means they believe that human beings are somehow different and separate from each other because of ethnicity. Okay, that's an ethnocentric worldview. You have others who have a human centric world meaning they understand and recognize that all human beings are the same and we're are all intimately connected with one another. And then you have a cosmocentric review, would says everything is connected to each other, everything is connected together. Now I choose to see the world through a cosmic view, okay, cosmocentric review, because I recognize that as human beings again, we are spiritual beings having a human experience versus human being having a spiritual experience. With that being said, I also believe, once again we started talking about purpose, that there's a reason that I am a black man. There's a divine purpose in it because here in America we still have a media that has that constantly bombards us with negative stories and images about black men and there is a belief that we are somehow different and unfortunately, in this culture there are systems that are still in place that as black people, we have not achieved a level of equality because of our judicial system, because of our media. So there's still lots of challenges out there. And so this current event that happened to George Floyd, event in which the young guy was killed by policeman for the head, that this cop has his knee on this guy's neck for eight minutes and forty six seconds in the guy dies basically on life television. Tragic. Yeah, tragic, and as tragic as it was, there is a awakening, I believe that's occurring because that incident, I believe, has cracked open the heart of America in a whole new way, especially for white people, because I think there was this sense that here in America, because we had chosen a black president, that racism sort of just disappeared. But obviously racism hasn't disappeared. It's still a huge issue, huge but the optimist in me says I see the world through what I'll call an evolutionary worldview, because there's this intelligence that created everything. It knows exactly what it's doing. And so if you really pull back and look at it from an evolutionary worldview. When it comes to race, as mentioned, I'm six, I'll be sixty this year. So I remember the civil rights movement very clearly. I remember in an element in elementary school. I remember having race riots between black and white. I remember sitting at home watching a little black and white TV and my grandparents and the family be watching TV and whenever and if ever, you saw a black person on television, it was a huge event. It was like, Oh my Gosh, Sydney Party as on TV. So they're calling each other on the phone making sure that you're watching TV because there's a black person on TV in a positive...

...light. MMM. So think about that. And so in my short lifetime I've seen this country go from not allowing black people to vote to choosing a black person to lead the country. I've seen this country go from not having black people on television to now having black people own television stations. So I see the world through a very positive lens, Evolutionary Lens, but at the same time I'm not blind. We still have challenges in our world in regards to race. But ultimately, if you want to get really philosophical, think about this in a spiritual context. There's a woman named Barbara Marks Hubbard who run wrote an amazing book called conscious evolution, and in the book she talks about the idea, the theory, that human beings are still evolving. Now, obviously we're not evolving physically, but we're evolving in consciousness, and so each generation, I believe each generation has a higher and higher level of consciousness, and so she predicts that human beings are evolving to what she calls Homo Universalis. Homo Universalis meaning one human. Okay. So, taking that idea, when I look at the world and all the crap that's going on, if this is true, which I believe it is, the trajectory that we're on as a species is actually really positive because if you look at race, if you look at gender. Now I'm speaking from the context of America and the progress that we've made as a country. From you know, it's hadn't been sixty years or so when women couldn't vote. You remember that. So now in this country, if you look at the influx of women in all areas of our society, for example, there's more women graduating from college than men these days. There's more women in the workforce than men these days here in America. So I believe these are all positive trends, because what we're coming to understand is we're moving past this idea that, as human beings, were different and separate from each other. We're evolving to the understanding that we're all one, we're all connected intimately. We have a media that it's job is to sensationalize and cause fear and it's what's what drives the overwhelming majority of how people think. But then there are people like myself who inject a different point of view, and so by injecting this different point of view, you can now start shifting the consciousness of the planet. And so I'm a firm believer that one person can change the world, and so my job is to take my gifts and talents and use them in some way to make the world a better place, and in doing so I fulfill my divine purpose and I make the word a little bit better. How would you speak to me for versus, say, another, another black man, in the perspective that I should carry out in an encouraging sort of way? Well, they g if there's someone I'm forty three, if someone else, a black man and I were just together, separate us in different rooms, how would you encourage me to recognize the challenges, but also being optimistic about an evolutionary universalism that we can all aspire two together. Well, see, I wouldn't speak to you any differently than I would speak to a black man, and that's what I figured. That's what I was hoping you're getting at. Yeah, so I wouldn't speak to you any differently, and so I could sit in a room with you bright and we would say I could say hey, Brian, how do you feel about this, and I could create a space in which you and I could have a conversation about anything. Number One, because I'm not going to be defensive, I'm not going to be attacking you, judging you,...

...criticizing you, I'm going to be connecting with you. I'm going to give you a space to be authentic and you sharing your beliefs and your feelings. Okay, that's a really difficult thing to do because, especially with race, it's a highly charged topic. We have ideas and beliefs about what you know, our beliefs about race. But for a my worldview, when I see Brian, I see a white guy, obviously physically, but what I know is that's not who you really are. What I know is that your core is a spiritual being that I'm connecting to and I can connect to it, I can relate to you, I can share with you pretty much anything, because I don't see you as different. Now my question to to you might be when you see racial injustice, how does that make you feel? Now, most people will go to what they think. Well, you know, I've heard people say, for example, when George floor was killed, people were bringing up the fact that he had a bad past. Right, so they're thinking about things versus feeling the compassion of watching a person die. Yeah, right. So if we can get out of the thinking and get into the feeling, that's where we connect to, rather than trying to justify something saying, you know, this is a fellow human and there was no other words than to say or is tragic and it should never happen. Yeah, so the question becomes as a group, collectively, white people, are you willing to feel the pain that we, as black people, feel on a daily basis as a result of our skin color? See, there's a there's a woman, I can't remember her name. She happens to be a white woman. She talks about race a lot and she she asked this question in her seminars or whatever. We're white people. She says, I want you to raise your hand. I want you to raise your hand if you are willing to move through the world as a black person, and I'm paraphrasing. That's not exactly the worst as she you. She said, so raise your hand if you would be comfortable moving through the world as a black person. And then she says nobody ever raises their hand. She says, why is that? Because deep down you know as a white person, as a white person, you're not going to experience the world the same way. So, collectively, as human beings, we recognize if you're white, you may not be able to empathize with being black, but you can have compassion, hmm, and sympathy and recognize that. Okay, I sense, I can see that there are princes. Black people are treated differently. Now here's another thing that I will interject, and I think this is sort of not the way to go about it. So there's a lot of talk right now about white privilege. I'm sure you've heard that term right. I don't think white people should feel guilty about white privilege. You shouldn't feel guilty about your ethnicity. You shouldn't feel guilty about something your grandparents might have done. You shouldn't feel shame, are guilt about that. You should embrace your ethnicity, but you also want, again, should have compassion for people who don't look like you and recognize that who you are simply bout the color of your skin automatically makes your life a little simpler, it's true, but you shouldn't feel bad about that. It's it's a challenge, like it's like, you know, a double edged sword. However you slice it, someone's not going to be happy, someone's not going to be comfortable. It's, as you said, it's, you know, it's a charged topic and and I think there's almost this is my you know, it something like, you say, a hypothetical someone doesn't. Some people don't answer hypothetical questions because it's a hypothetical question. And for me to I think he used the word to have empathy right, to have compassion or it's hard to have empathies that but to have compassion like...

I would. I would change my shoes, I would change my shoes with someone. But we can't do it. And that's the part that it makes it so difficult right it just like I wish I could do this. If if I could do this, I mean there's some things they you know, good man will lay down his life or another. If we could do it in all things would I think there would be a lineup of people, a sufficient you know, if one person could do it right, and I think there was, to lay down their life for the many, and that would be enough in asking a human, asking a person to do so. I think there would be a sufficient amount of people to do so. But we can so we have to live, you know, and work on it and we have to engage with one another and we have to connect and we have to keep doing and being and, as you're saying, remind whether it's a white privilege or the difficulties happening to black people in, you know, around the world or in America, as you're referring on from Canada. But you know, I see it right. I I first came to Korea and they didn't hire people who were not white and spoke English. It was it's not just Korea, it's China, Japan, all of those countries, and I'm like why? And now things have changed, right, because I know there are other cultures and other ethnicities in Korea and in Japan. So things have changed. With this is I'm talking fifteen years. But I was aware of it and like so really and it didn't have it any more talent than anyone else. It's I happen to get have a piece of paper that said I finished something and that was it. And so it's so hard to switch the shoes. But I think we do definitely have to work on it in understand and acknowledge there is something going on. But, as you're saying, as the optimist, is to get through this noise and acknowledge it. And don't you know, the media that it, it pounds on you, pounds on you, pound pounds on someone and it makes people bitter, especially if there's no forgiveness, especially if there's no love, if there's no sincerity, there's no compassion, and people just another reason to you know, be hateful. So it's so hard, but it can't be pushed to the side. Well, again, let's go back to the breakdown, breakthrough prison. Breakdown is hard, it's tough and right now people are really, really uncomfortable. There's a guy named you manual, a chew, former NFL player, black guy, amazing guy, and he does a show, it's an online show now that it's called uncomfortable conversations with a black man, okay, and he's bringing on celebrities and athletes and so forth, and he's having these really difficult conversations in a context in which people are going, Oh, you know, I never thought about just like you and I are having right now. He's doing this on a national stage and it's really powerful. And so are you familiar with Matthew mcconaughey, the actor, Matthew mcconaughey? Yeah, Matthew mcconaughey's he was one of the first guys on the show and he said Matthew, so this is he says, welcome to uncomfortable conversations with a black man. So you get the share. are asked any question, any question that you may have, and so they had this amazing conversation about, you know, his beliefs as a white guy versus emanuels beliefs as a black guy, and it's it's a really moving show. He had a series where are an episode in which, you know, he brought on some interracial couples, talking about the challenges of interracial couples and how, you know, the interracial couples, how they have to, you know, navigate the differences and cultures and so forth. But the show is a huge, huge success right now and it's really engaging people in conversations and ways that we really haven't seen before. And once again, another reason for my optimism that show and the conversation that he's having and again from my perspective, but I'm seeing collectively as a species, a human species, humanity is simply waking up, because this divine intelligence that set all this in motion and knows exactly what it's doing and it's intelligent enough to build a system that, I believe, ultimate ultimately, will create heaven on earth. I believe that without question, that's the trajectory that we're on now.

Well, that happened in my life? Hand my lifetime? Probably not, but the trajectory that were on as a species tells me that we are still evolving, we are still waking up, we are starting to understand the oneness and unity in humanity. And so the question we have to ask ourselves is, are we willing? Are we willing first and foremost, to do our inner work to heal whatever scars we we may be carrying around which would keep us from being able to connect intimately with others? Because when we do our inner work and tap into the essence of who we are, what will find is that we are no different and will will stop seeing people differently, because that difference is just the belief, it's just the thought that you think over and over again. So if we can change that belief that were different, we change the world. Coach Michael, what do you what do you find yourself doing on a daily basis? How does your days look? Well, I'm a firm believer in meditation, in silence, and so every morning begins with just that silence. I'll spend twenty minutes in complete silence, just sort of just getting centered and just being at peace with myself. And then there's a guy named Mike Doling the Eli one Mike do and he sends out this daily email and it's called notes from the universe and every email it's like imagine having a conversation with the universe and you can exchange the word guy when universe if you like, but he sends up these notes from the universe and they're always thought provoking, insightful and sometimes hilarious. But I spend a lot of time in quiet contemplation with the message that he sends out because there's something in his messages that really, really resonate with me. So I'll spend a little, you know, a little time just there in contemplation about whatever that message might be. For today the message may come across and it may say note from the universe and you may just say you rock, you know. So it's a positive thing. So I just I put myself in a mindset of positivity and gratitude. Then I'll again I'll just kind of go and check emails or whatever, get that out of the way and, depending on if I've got a speaking engagement or not, I'll get prepared for that and once the day is over, I'm my wife comes home and I love on love on her a little bit and Kisser and Hugger and count my blessings for having her alive and go to sleep and have a good night. So you're a full time writer, a full time speaker. That's how you spend your days preparing for that coach. A couple more questions. You've been very gracious to me to give me your time. What advice do you have for people starting in work, people who might be disappointed with their job, someone's in between jobs? What sort of advice would you give to them to give them sort of motivation, if you know, a flicker of a motivation and some positive thought for their day? If if you'll buy into my idea, at my concept that, as human beings, we are energetic beings. and Are you familiar with the law of attraction? Is Okay. So if we're energetic beings, which I believe we are, then we don't attract what we want, we attract who we are. So, if I'm going a job that I hate, and I really hate it, what kind of energy am I going to be emitty? It's going to be a neg it's going to be negative. Okay, so guess what, as I'm sending out that negative energy everything around me, it's going to attract that which is like it, that negative energy. So when I go to work, I'm probably going to attract a boss that is just a pain in the butt. Right, okay, if I go to work with that kind of energy, my co workers aren't going to be the friendliest people are ant. Why? Because I'm attracting to me that which I am so, no matter what situation we may be in, we must be connected to the energy that we're giving off so we can do really uncomfortable jobs without being negative. And I'm going to I'm going to share, I'm going to share this story with you about that, because gratitude is an energy that attracts more things to be grateful for. So let me do...

I want to share this story. So, as mentioned, I was homeless for a while, living out of my car, and to survive, to eat, I would go to what's called the Labor Pool, and the Labor Pool is where you have ex convicts and homeless people. They come to display and they'll get these little odd jobs and they may make, you know, five bucks an hour, right, but at least you can make some money, right, eat. So I go to the Labor Hall to find a job just so I could get some food. Well, I went several days in a row and I didn't get picked to go out on a job. So I had no money, no food, I was hungry and I had been getting ahead. Began studying this spiritual stuff, right, this law of attraction, whatever, and so I'm sitting up late one night, I'm having a prayer and I said God, you okay, look, I just need a job today so I can get my little fifteen, twenty bucks, so I can do I said, so, whatever job you're willing to give me, I'm willing to do it, but I just need a job tomorrow. I just when I go in, I'm praying that I will get a job. So I go into Labor Hall the next morning, and this is like five in the morning, right. So I go into the Labor Hal and I sit down. I wasn't there for two minutes and the guy just points at me. He says, Hey, you coming. He says you have a car. I said yes, he said great. He gives me a ticket for the job. So I'm driving down the road number one. I realize that God had answered my prayer. I had a job, I was going to get some money. So I drove to the job and it happens to be one of those Porta potty companies, you know, those portable and baller companies, and my job, what's the clean them. Okay, so I pull in, I look around, I go. So the guy who I pull up to now again, he deals with, you know, like I said, homeless people, ex convicts or whatever. So he's got a really negative attitude. Anyway. Yeah, so he comes up for me. He grassed my ticket, he says, okay, here's what I need to do. He takes me out there, he's give me, gives me this raincoat, a holes, a my, a bucket. He says, I need you to clean out these portable toilet and he's a real jackets to be honest. So, anyway, I'm sitting there and I'm going, do I really need this money that the head do? I rich want to do this, and I said, oaps God, I promise that if you gave me your child game, I look at ever you gave me right. So I'm sitting here, I'm cleaning these parts and I'm smiling. I'm calling my blessings that I have a job, one right and one. Yeah. Now all of a sudden it begins to rain and I'm not talking just rain, I'm talking to wrinch you down for right. So I go inside to the guy. said, Hey, man, can I wait until us? Not Right. He Says No, you need to finish those now because they have to go out very quickly. That's why I gave you a raincoat. So I'm in the rain cleaning out a freaking portable toilet with the smile on my face. Thank you, thank you for this job. Gratitude. Did I like it? Course not, but I was grateful. I was grateful for the job. So I did that for eight hours, right, and it rains for probably five of those hours. So I go back to work. I get my little check. It's like forty five dollars or whatever. I'm smiling in the one I get to eat. I sleep in my car. I get up the next day to go to the Labor pool again. I sit down the same guy. He says, Hey, you got a car, right, you're gonna you got it. Yeah, he poised to me because a lot of the guys don't have cars, right, so they can go to yeah, so he goes, come here, he dis meant take it. So I now I go to this job and it's in this really fancy office building that they're building, brand new office building right. So I go in complete opposite experience. The foreman comes over, he says, Michael, welcome, he says here, this is what I need you to do now. It just so happens that my background is in building materials and electric M and so here I am. I'm supposably cleaning. I'm supposed to be cleaning stuff, but one of the electrinis needed some help and I just happened to...

...walk over and I said, look, I know how to do that. He said, do you really? I said Yeah, he says great, can you do so I helped this guy all day and the guy was so impressed that the electrician hired me fulltime. Just like cleaning the garage back when you're fourteen. I can do that. So my point here is for that person who is in that job that they hate, the first thing they've got to do is clean up that energy. The first thing they've got to do is learned to find something to be grateful for, no matter how much they may not like may not like being there, because until they shift that energy, nothing is going to change for them. So an attitude of gratitude is the simplest way to begin shifting that energy. Begins Shifting who you are, because again, you don't attract what you want, you attract who you are. So a lot of people say, I want to make more money. Well, if you don't resonate inside with the I am good enough to have more money, I love myself for who I am, I desert you. If you don't have that energy, you'll never attract more money to me, you're never attractive better position. It all begins with you. It begins with the attitude of gratitude. So be grateful for wherever you are, whatever you are, whatever you're doing, and the more you're grateful, the more you've attracting to be grateful for forgiveness, love and gratitude. There you go, coach Michael. Where can they find you? Simplest way is coach Michael Taylorcom. You can find out all about my work and books and everything right there, coach Michael Taylorcom. Coach Michael Taylor. One more question. You've already answered it. Why do you? Why do you work? Why do I work? Because I believe that I am simply a divine manifestation of the infinite intelligence that created this amazing universe that we live in, and so, as this manifestation, as this divine expression of the universe, it is my responsibility to share my unique gifts and talents with the world to make it a better place, and that's why I work and I believe that you're doing that, coach Michael Taylor. I appreciate you and I hope you all the best and I would like to talk to you again sometime. Thank you, Brian. Appreciate it. The the, the, the, the, the, the,...

...the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the. Thank you for listening to this episode of why we work with Brian v be sure to subscribe, follow and share with others so they two can be encouraged in their work. I hope that you have yourself a productive, be a joyful day in your work.

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